Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six (Mac)

Yes, dear reader, I know what you are thinking. And that is a very scary thing. You're asking yourself, "Why would I, a respectable housewife/businessman/plumber/U.S. postal worker/ want to shoot anything? What need have I, a rational and reasonable person, have for a game which involves super-bad machine guns, high-powered sniper rifles, and fragmentation grenades?" Well, dear reader, I am glad you asked. Now, brace yourselves.

Let's face it, have you ever had one of those days? Stop staring at me with a quizzical expression. And sit up straight, you look like a slob. There, better. Now, I'll ask you again: have you ever had one of those days? You know exactly what I mean. Your spouse left his dirty socks on your just-vaccuumed floor (again). Your girlfriend just informed you that she "needs some space" (leaving out the unspoken but implied ending "without you in it"). Your boss asked you to type up a 100-page report on last quarter's toilet paper sales, and have it on his desk by Friday. Some jerk cut you off on your drive home...while you where in the slow lane.

Yes, one of those days.

These are the times when your children install motion detectors, post sentries, and appoint scouts and runners to inform them of your approach and facilitate their advanced hiding from your stomping steps. These are the times when your coworkers suddenly find their cubicle floor quite fascinating and pretend not to notice you, afraid that they might be struck dead if they made eye-contact with your flaming countenance. These are the times when your dog and cat take one look at your haggard, wild-eyed expression, then skulk off meekly into their corner and play dead for a few hours.

In short, it is times like these when you absolutely have to shoot something, right now. You would give half of your emergency SPAM stockpile just to feel the blessed release of emptying an entire clip on an M16.

At trying moments such as these, it's nice to know that Rogue Spear will always be there to whisper soothingly in your ear, "Yeah. Go for it."

Storyline:
When you fire up Rogue Spear, you are no longer Bill, The Loser Stockboy. You are no longer Suzie, the Hip-Expanding, Getting-Older SAHM. You are no longer Sordid-1, the Potato Salad-Eating, Long-Winded, Colloquialist Bum. No siree, you are now a member of the elite RAINBOW counter-terrorism unit. You are the best of the best of the best. You are better trained, better equipped, and better prepared. In short, muaahahahaha...you rock.

Now then, Mr. or Mrs. Elite Operative, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to fight terrorism wherever it may rear its ugly head. As such, you will tour the world in style, shooting bad guys in exotic and foreign places. You will thwart terrorist plots, rescue grateful hostages, and prevent the wanton nuking of the hemisphere. The free world looks to you. If you succeed, they survive. If you fail...well, that would kinda suck, but you can always try again.

Graphics: *** (Hey, they're the closest to stars, okay?)
One of the main drawbacks of this game is the simple fact that it is a couple years old. As such, the graphics are a bit dated. Some objects are a bit blocky and square, grass and vegetation looks like a bunch of green pixel-dust, and background trees and skylines look like cutouts. But don't let this fool you: Rogue Spear is still a great game. The dated graphics don't interfere with a great gameplay experience. In fact, once you've immersed yourself in this game, you won't even notice them. You'll be too busy sneaking up on bad guys and hoping your teammembers have your back.

Gameplay: *****
This is absolutely excellent. Firstly, there is a wide range of weaponry available, from the trusty M16 to a Baretta to a SPAS-12 shotgun. Additionally, you will also carry a secondary weapon, choosing from several types of pistols. Silencers are also available, and often necessary. You may also bring along a few grenades, flashbangs, or even a lockpick kit, depending on the mission. You also choose what kind of body-armor to wear.

Once you have properly equipped yourself, you will be inserted into the mission. There are many different levels, environments, and diverse challenges to navigate. You will have to sneak up on terrorists from behind...snipe at them from a distance...or, sometimes, simply engage in a no-holds-barred firefight. But watch out...these terrorists have guns, too...and they know how to use them.

There are a wide range of realistic controls and actions. You can walk, run, sidestep, peak around things, wisper instructions to other team members with pre-set keys, ("Alpha Team, Go!"), etc. Almost every key will come in handy at some point.

The terrorists themselves are not just Middle-Eastern, Allah-worshipping extremists. There are also Russians, radical British Neo-Nazis with tarantula tattoos on their skinheads, sunglassed Matrix-looking agents, and various other bad guys to contend with in different missions.

The A.I. of the terrorists is somewhat inconsistent, which makes the game even more realistic. Different terrorists behave with varying degrees of smarts. If you play on Recruit level, (the easiest,) you will often laugh at a villain's stupidity...just as his more cerebrally-endowed friend walks up and shoots you from behind. Indeed, the real strong point of the computer A.I. is the fact that the bad guys are almost completely unpredictable, rarely using the same pattern of action twice. Sometimes they will come right out and blast away at you...other times they will try to sneak up on your goody-twoshoes behind.

The difficulty of the game is one frustrating aspect of Rogue Spear. Even on Recruit, most of the missions are very difficult. Many missions involve rescuing hostages, meaning that if one of the hostages is killed, you fail. But the terrorists guarding them are often ultra paranoid, and sometimes they will kill the hostages while you're still outside and haven't even been detected yet.

Besides Recruit, there are two other levels, Veteran and Elite. Recruit level is hard enough. While you will kill a large percentage of the terrorists with little sweat, there will usually be one or two who hide in a corner and shoot you when you least expect it. Veteran level is much harder, and if you play on Elite level, be prepared to face some bad guys with seriously mad skills. Simply showing your face to a terrorist will be enough to warrant an immediate cranial rearrangement. In short, be prepared for some frustration.

But fear not, dear reader, for the beauty of Rogue Spear is about to shine through once again: enter the cheat codes. These codes are widely available, (they're even listed openly on the Rogue Spear website,) and they can be a welcome relief when you're tired of dying. For instance, during a mission, you can hit Enter, type in "teamgod", and presto, you are now an invincible iron-man (or woman). Or, you can type "teamshadow" and become an invisible angel of death. These cheats are quite fun when you just feel like venting. And after all, that's what democracy is all about.

Sound: ***** (plus an extra *)
This is where Rogue Spear really shines (well, as much as a thin cardboard box can possibly shine, anyway). The detail of the sound is incredible. All guns have their own distinctive, unique sound, and you always hear your empty shells hitting the ground after you fire. When you are sneaking through grass or other terrain, you are alone with your thoughts...and you hear crickets and birds chirping. A terrorist walks past your hiding place, and you hear his footsteps clacking on the hard ground...but the footsteps are so realistic, it's scary. You can actually hear the clu-clump of the heel, then the toe of the bad guy's boot hitting the ground. (Editor's Note: the descriptive phrase "clu-clump" is a highly scientific and technical term. Please do not use this term without proper supervision. Thank you.)

When you use the cheat code "teamshadow" to become invisible, you can walk freely among the terrorists, and simply listen. You will hear guards, after making their rounds several times, suddenly stretch and yawn. You will see another guard holding a lit cigarette, which he will puff on from time to time. It is simple details such as these which make Rogue Spear a classic; the fact that they include behaviors that you really would never see unless you had the "invisibility" code activated shows incredible attention to minutia.

Then there are the talking terrorists. When a terrorist detects you, he immediately calls to his buddies in various languages, depending on the nationality of the terrorist group you are fighting in this particular mission. Some terrorists use English, some speak Russian, others speak Turkish, etc.

One amusing detail of the game is the fact that the foreign terrorists will often swear at you in their native tongue after they shoot you. (Never in English, though...parents, don't worry.) As you crumple to the ground, you will hear them vehemently denounce your scummy, imperialist butt. After such an occurrence, I like to replay the mission with Invincibility on, just to show them who's boss.

Replayability: *****
Quite honestly, this game is incredibly addictive. A large portion of this addictiveness is the fact that there are so many ways to play the game. In addition to the various missions and difficulty levels, there is also a feature called "Terrorist Hunt", which allows you to face up to 30 terrorists on any map, with your only objective being to kill them, kill them all! Additionally, online play is available and highly recommended. There's nothing quite like the knowledge that the computer-generated person you just shot is actually controlled by the jerk who cussed you out two minutes ago.

Finally, there's the ability to play the game with or without cheat codes. The challenge of the game is enjoyable, but the fun of the cheats is positively Valhalla-esque.

However you prefer to play the game, you will play for hours. You will play until your eyes water and your vision is blurred. You will play until your spouse leaves you and your children begin to ask who the scary man with the two-week stubble is. You will play until you lose your job, your house, your social life, and all other traces of your existence. But don't worry...as long as you have your computer and your Rogue Spear, you'll be fine. After all, it's the simple pleasures in life that are most gratifying.

Final Words:
In the final analysis, the only thing preventing a five-star rating for this game is its somewhat-old graphics.

For additional addictivity, I highly recommend the Urban Operations expansion pack. It contains new missions and new guns, as well as a couple new modes to play with.

So then, comrade, are you ready to save the world? After all, as Sordid-1 so eloquently and artistically put it, "It's fun to kill things!"

Editor's Note: The author vehemently denies rumors that he is insane or even remotely unstable. He honestly can't understand why people think this about him. It is hurting his self-esteem and confidence, and he is considering therapy. He hopes that you all see what you have done.

No Computer-Generated Entities where harmed in the making of this review. Thank you.